Orthodox Reflections

Long as I remember

The rain been comin’ down

Clouds of mystery pourin’

Confusion on the ground

Good men through the ages

Tryin’ to find the sun

And I wonder

Still, I wonder

Who’ll stop the rain

—Creedence Clearwater Revival

The disillusioned conservative writer Pedro Gonzalez recently gave voice to the despair that is crushing the souls of so many today like a massive spiritual boulder.  He writes:

Eliza is a young girl with icy blue eyes and light blonde hair. She says she lives paycheck to paycheck and only has a little money left over at the end of the month, mainly for bills. What free time she has on weekends goes to errands for which there is no time in the week.

Eliza disclosed these details about her life in a teary TikTok video. “I’m not made for this,” she said. “I don’t have the money, time, or energy to enjoy my life outside of work, and I don’t know what to do about it anymore.”

She’s right about not being “made for this” because humans aren’t. What Eliza described is not a life in the true sense but living and dying as an automaton. And that, unfortunately, is the reality shouldered by most people today. . . .

Those facts are important because they show that what Eliza described is not something that exclusively or even primarily applies to young people who are “starting out” and have not yet acclimated to adulthood. Eliza is not the point; the point is millions of people feel this way and live Damoclean lives of financial precarity. But the fact Eliza is young and, based on her social media, typically liberal, did help to drop some masks. See Phillip Buchanan, who goes by “Catturd” online.

Buchanan has amassed a Twitter following of 2.3 million. I’m sorry to say he is a fixture of the new right commentariat. Newsweek dubbed him the “King of MAGA Twitter.”

Buchanan retweeted Eliza’s video with a seven-word caption: “Stop whining and make me a sandwich.”

 . . . The left wants you deprived of property as a permanently plugged-in and soulless widget, interchangeable with border crossers who beat cops in New York City and flip the bird at America after the fact. And the new right, well, I don’t know what it wants anymore. I don’t think it knows better than a dog chasing a car does. Neither has any real notion of eudaimonia, a Greek word generally translated as “happiness,” but it carries a profoundly richer meaning than the English suggests.

The late Daniel N. Robinson, a professor of psychology at Georgetown University, drew a connection between the “pursuit of happiness” clause in the Declaration of Independence and eudaimonia. The authors, after all, were classically informed and did not have in mind the pursuit of pleasure with that line, in which case living in an entertainment pod with an AI robot girlfriend would be ideal.

“It’s much better translated as a kind of ‘flourishing,’” Robinson said in a lecture. Drawing on Aristotle’s account of eudaimonia, he continued:

In modern parlance, you’d say it’s very akin to being in the flow; it’s a full form of life that’s being lived in a certain way. The concert pianist from the point at which the pianist begins to play scales to the point at which the seasoned pianist serves up a perfect rendering of “Moonlight” Sonata. Do you see? This activity . . . of a lifetime, it’s a flourishing kind of lifetime, many, many bumps in the road, many things that have to be overcome. But it’s the attempted realization of a perfectionist ideal. That’s what the “pursuit of happiness” should be understood as referring to.

Not everyone is cut out to be a concert pianist or an astronaut or you name it. That’s not what Robinson meant. It’s not what I mean.

Humans are the only creatures on earth capable of this kind of flourishing, but flourishing is hard under economic conditions designed to keep people working and ultimately living like animals, cattle incapable even of starting families or owning homes.

The left thinks the solution is treating slightly better-off Americans like kulaks. The right seems to just want to sh*tpost. Whoever can figure out how to address this in a compelling way could hold power for a hundred years.

Mr. Gonzalez places the problem mainly in the economic sphere, but by his raising the issue of eudaimonia/happiness, he has shown that it is actually in the spiritual dimension where the problem mainly lies.

To give an adequate answer to the issues he raises, we must begin by trying to understand the world in which we live.  We do not live in Paradise.  We do not live in utopia.  We do not live in fantasy fairie land.  We do not live in the political philosophers’ state of nature.  We do not live in a rationalistic, scientistic, non-theistic neutral ground called the saeculum (the secular).

We live in Babylon.

The renowned priest-monk Father Athanasius Mitilianaios, commenting on Revelation 14:8, defines Babylon for us thusly (via this video by Fr Peter Heers):

SAINT ARETHAS: “And what is Babylon? Nothing more than the world of corruption” (PG 106, 688B).

“Thus, it became the symbol of the end of the corrupt world that lives in apostasy from God. As you also may know, the etymology of the word Babylon means confusion. (Gen. 11:1-9) This term was given when God confused the tongues of the people during their aspiration to build a tower that would reach heaven.”

SAINT ANDREW OF CAESAREA: “Babylon is interpreted as confusion and it symbolizes the present tumultuous world” (PG 106, 345A).

 . . . “This entire fabrication is called Babylon. In this sense now, the angel comes to announce, Fallen, fallen is Babylon the Great. Then it will become apparent that these are all vain efforts, just like the construction of the Tower of Babel. The people at the end of history will reflect on how meaningless and inane all our accomplishments were, how vain and futile this highly evolved and advanced technical civilization has become! We stepped on the moon; we reached and navigated our planetary system. What did we gain? We worked in vain. Babylon will fall. In other words, this confusion will come to an end.”

Babylon, then, is this entire vain civilization of technology and pride and economic striving that Mr. Gonzalez described in his essay above.

Knowing this, however, is not enough.  Mr. Gonzalez seems already very much aware of the vanity of living in Babylon.  The other question that needs answering is, What is the opposite of Babylon?  Where can eudaimonia/happiness be truly experienced?  The answer to such questions is the Kingdom of God.

And what is the Kingdom of God?  It is a man experiencing the fulness of life – sharing in that life, in fact – that exists within the All-Holy Trinity – the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit:  ‘And this is eternal life, that they know thee the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom thou has sent’ (St John’s Gospel 17:3).  The Kingdom is not overly concerned with material things:  ‘Therefore do not be anxious, saying, “What shall we eat?” or “What shall we drink?” or “What shall we wear?” For the Gentiles seek all these things; and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things shall be yours as well’ (St Matthew’s Gospel 6:31-3).  Likewise, the Holy Apostle Paul writes, ‘For the kingdom of God is not food and drink but righteousness and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit’ (Letter to the Romans 14:17).

The Kingdom is not found in a God that is an impersonal essence or idea, or who is vindictive and angry, or alone, or who exists as many limited beings (polytheism):  It exists only in the Community of Love that is the Holy Trinity, as the Holy Elder Sophrony Sakharov (+1993) reveals.  Saith he:

When we talk about existential knowledge of the Personal God, we have in mind community of being, not crude intellectual interpretation of the problem.  Man-persona lives by God and in God.  This reality can be expressed in another way – God takes possession of the entire man, mind, heart and body.  The cognizant persona and the God Who is cognized are conjoined.  Neither the one nor the Other in any way becomes materia circa quam in this fusion.  Reciprocal recognition – by God of man and by man of God – is a ‘personal’ matter which excludes ‘objectivisation’.  This alliance of love is a spiritual act through which the Beloved becomes our life.  By its genus, virtue, majesty, harmony and power, Divine love surpasses all that the earth knows.  This being so, it is a marvellous thing that such a state be apprehended as the only one natural for man.  How wondrous that He is Other and at the same time mine!  (We Shall See Him As He Is, translated by Rosemary Edmonds, St Herman of Alaska Brotherhood, Platina, Cal., 2012, pgs. 217-8)

When we pray, when we participate in the Divine Liturgy and receive the Precious Body and Blood of Christ, when we live the commandments of the Holy Gospel – it is then that we experience the Kingdom.

Yet, as we have seen in the foregoing, it is personal examples and not merely words that are most effective at portraying the truth.  Thus, the best answer to Mr. Gonzalez’s queries will be the life of someone who has left Babylon and is now journeying towards the Kingdom of God.  Such a person is Mother Xenia (in the world, Tatiana Pashkova), an Orthodox nun.  She had found success in the usual worldly definition of that word but still felt ill at ease:

After music school, I entered the Moscow University of Culture and Art, majoring in directing, and I ended up having a wonderful teacher—Yuri Vladimirovich Nepomnyaschy, who had a strong foundation in classical art. At the end of my fourth year, I was invited to the Russian State Central Concert Hall to assist the head director.

This was a period of climbing the creative career ladder. Outwardly, everything was more than fine: I was living in the center of Moscow, working at one of the leading concert halls. But an internal crisis was growing; it felt like I was in a vicious cycle—I couldn’t find any peace. Perhaps it’s natural and normal when someone doesn’t know God and lives without Him—he’ll have a gaping void inside one way or another. You try to fill this void with aesthetics, music, friends, travel—whatever you like. But the more you put in there, the faster it all burns up, like in a furnace…

Such ignorance and blindness are providentially given to man. The soul experiences bitterness, deadlock, and hopelessness in order to prepare for the encounter with the Lord.

I couldn’t seem to start a family no matter what, which tormented me with internal sorrows and worries. I also had some creative disappointments: I was trying to find my niche on the stage, in show business, but I felt deeply useless and inadequate, as if society didn’t need me. And through this state of inner disbalance and searching for something real, deep, and true, the Lord apparently led me to meet Himself.

She describes her translation from Babylon to the Kingdom of God:

Then I became a Godmother for the second time. For the sake of my Goddaughter and her mother, I went to church sometimes, where it was beautiful and peaceful. But my heart was silent. This happens to many who don’t know the Living God, because the Holy Spirit hasn’t touched them yet.

Then came my first trip to Diveyevo in 2006. The same friend and her husband took me on a pilgrimage there, an excursion, to see the ancient monastery. Her spiritual father strictly instructed her not to impose anything on me, not to drag me anywhere. After all, it’s only natural to fight back when someone drags you somewhere.

We stayed in a hotel near the monastery. As we were walking around, I dropped into a Church icon shop and bought a small book, How to Spend a Holy Day in Diveyevo. Spring was all around; the domes of the Diveyevo Monastery were off in the distance… I sat down on a bench and opened the pamphlet and … suddenly felt such love, purity, and light that it’s difficult to describe in words. It was like the sun was turned on inside me. And at the same time, I saw myself from the outside and realized the true state of my soul.

I returned to my friends saying: “I need to go to Confession right away.” It was impossible to tolerate my filth next to such purity and love. My friend had been trying to drag me to Confession for so many years, to explain what it is and why it’s necessary; she suggested books for me to read, and the Lord Himself turned everything around and explained everything in one moment.

The Lord responded to my desire to come out of this inner impasse and into the light, and seeing my heart and soul, He Himself came out to meet me, embrace me, and grant me to know the touch of grace.

From there, she began to understand that monasticism was the path she was to walk in life.  But note that it didn’t bring easy circumstances, but rather more difficult ones (something the Elizas of the world must keep in mind; the Lord, however, compensates for this):

Speaking with Batiushka, reading books, praying the Jesus Prayer, I realized that I didn’t want another life, and becoming a nun was only a matter of time. People have different fates: Sometimes a switch suddenly flips for someone, but for me everything happened gradually; it ripened over a long time. Meeting Batiushka was the final chord.

Once, standing before an icon of St. Seraphim of Sarov, I mentally asked him: “How should I live; what’s my path?” And I heard a quiet reply: “Help Batiushka build the monastery.” No voice, no vision, just a calm and clear thought that resonated within.

 . . . On May 6, 2013, on the feast of St. George the Victorious and the Iveron Icon of the Mother of God, on the site where the monastery would be built, a memorial stone was laid and a cross was erected, which is now located in the alter of the lower church named for St. Seraphim of Sarov. I was tonsured on July 7, on the feast of the Nativity of St. John the Baptist.

The construction of our monastery in the city of Orsk began gradually, not far from the village of Kherson, where our sisterhood was born. In this village, an ordinary man, Anatoly Merzlyakov, wanted to revive the place where his ancestors had lived, return to the land of his ancestors, and raise a farm: He planted fields, raised cattle, and built a church. He allocated a house where, since 2008, two women had been living, who cleaned the church and took care of the garden. They’re schemanuns now.

Starting in April 2013, while the monastery complex was being built, we lived in the old church. We made partitions, making small cells. At that time, Batiushka was also dealing with the construction of the main cathedral in the city—he was its rector and was building the monastery at the same time.

 . . . The monastery is a serious choice. Making such a decision shouldn’t be emotional. We don’t “leave” for the monastery but “come.” We come to serve God, to meet our Bridegroom, to prepare for this meeting.

When someone goes to a monastery like a refuge—to hide from problems or from his restlessness and unfitness for the world—it can cause trouble. The monastic’s goal is Jesus Christ, the desire to meet Him and love Him, to unite with Him and love the whole world in Him. It’s also a willingness to die for Him every day. Therefore, when new sisters come to us, our main task is to understand their disposition and give them time. Time should show and reveal their true goal, why they came to the monastery. There’s only one criterion—love for the person of Jesus Christ and selflessness. Because love was, is, and will be synonymous with sacrifice and self-denial. Love’s not a feeling, but an action. Batiushka always talks about this in his homilies and books.

Monastic asceticism is the path of constant self-denial, moving away from yourself and towards God through various situations, through prayer.

For example, this happens when we prayerfully renounce ourselves, our imaginative thinking, feelings, thoughts, and we create a space for pure prayer so God Himself might find a place for Himself and pray in our heart. We try to renounce ourselves in fulfillment of obediences, in our relationships with each other. We push ourselves away and move towards God.

She then touches on the source of the malaise gripping so many people today, and what can be done about it:

Why was everything so good in childhood? Because it’s a time when you’re not completely, one-hundred percent responsible for your own fate—your parents are responsible for you.

And if father and mother didn’t instill the knowledge that there are a Father and Mother above them, then in adulthood the children remain orphans. But modern society persistently imposes the idea that you’re the master of your own fate and can make of yourself what you will. So there are egotistical grown-ups, with no one over them… If something goes right, they say it’s all due to their own merit; if something goes wrong, they fall into depression or blame others. How many generations of such orphans have we raised! But if the mother and father imparted the knowledge that there are the Lord and the Theotokos, then in any situation, the child will know and sense that he is not alone, and will turn to his Heavenly Parents: “Lord, have mercy;” “Most Holy Theotokos, don’t abandon me;” “Thank you, Lord;” “Forgive me, Lord. It didn’t work out this time, but I’ll keep trying…” This gives a sense of evenness and protection.

She sums up, speaking of her experiences in the Kingdom thus far:

Our goal is to unite with God. And on the path to this goal, we are consoled with the opportunity to touch such a state, when you’re with God and God is in you. That’s when true unity comes—the unity of the world, of people in God, the personhood of God. And you’re in it. This is happiness and joy.

Rejoice that God is in everything and everywhere. Everything is permeated with Him, this thread of the Holy Spirit. All circumstances, events, people, feelings, and experiences are strung like beads on this thread. Usually, we’re distracted by these beads, and we lose that main, continuous thread. But if we would always live it, feel it, then we would always rejoice. This is what the Apostle Paul calls us to when he says: Rejoice evermore. Pray without ceasing. In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you (1 Thess. 5:16-18). The Apostle Paul gives us a high benchmark to strive for, but it’s possible only in God and with God—there’s no other way.

Not everyone is meant to walk the path of monasticism, however.  Marriage will be the path of salvation for many, the way into the Kingdom.  Metropolitan Athanasios of Limassol (Cyprus) explains how this choice between marriage and monasticism should be made:

Of course, monasticism is not for everyone, and we should not all follow the same external path. The point is that we should reject sin, our passions, and love Christ most of all. Whether we decide to become monastics or get married is a matter of our free preference. It is we who choose. But regardless of whether we become monks or nuns, get married, remain celibate or serve as missionaries in Africa, we must love Christ above all. This is what the Gospel says, this is what Christ wants to say—that we must love Him above all else, and everything else is up to us.

 . . . No one can force marriage on you. If someone imposes it on you by force, marrying you to a woman you don’t love, you will quarrel and break up in the very first week. The same thing happens in monastic life: If someone forces you to become a monk or tricks you into becoming one, you will not run away in the first week, but on the very first or second day. Because it’s a matter of what the heart tells us.

But I repeat: In the Gospel Christ does not point us to an external way of life—marriage or monasticism. He points us to the real way of life in Christ: to love Christ above all and abandon everything else for the love of Him, regardless of whether we are married or monastics. This is the meaning of the Gospel.

To Mr. Gonzalez’s question of economic systems, the appropriate answer for now comes from a paraphrase of one of St Nikolai Velimirovich’s many letters:  Any system based on mercy and love will operate just fine (which is not what we have by and large in the States today).  But as to the larger problem of despair that lurks behind his words, we will let Elder Sophrony have a final word, which Mr. Gonzalez may find especially meaningful considering his disenchantment with Trumpism, etc.:

Christ’s prescript – ‘and despair not’ through St. Silouan is directed to our times which are noted for the extraordinarily black despair that envelops the whole universe.  People of our day, often against their will, become moral participants in endless local and even world-wide fratricide.  As such – that is, as impenitent moral accomplices – they naturally lose the grace of the Holy Spirit and are no longer able to believe in their immortality through resurrection.  Nor do they even seek to.  In this self-condemnation to evanescence lies the spiritual essence of despair (We Shall See Him As He Is, p. 236).

The human flourishing, the freedom from despair, that Mr. Gonzalez yearns for does exist.  It is in the Orthodox Church.  It may be seen in Mother Xenia, St Sophrony, and a host of others within the Church.  And this truth is expressed wonderfully by Mother Xenia’s spiritual father, Fr Sergei, in some lines addressed to her:

A disciple played a beautiful classical work for one of the Optina Elders. “Yes, the music is nice,” the Elder said. “But if you knew, child, what the music of the Spirit sounds like, how wonderful and incomparable it is, you would seek nothing else.” Tanya, the most precious thing we can acquire on earth is Christ: Long for Him, look for Him, and be happy.

May all the disenchanted children of the West have the wisdom to follow Fr Sergei’s radiant, golden advice.

–Walt Garlington is an Orthodox Christian living in Dixieland.  His writings have appeared on several web sites, and he maintains a site of his own, Confiteri: A Southern Perspective.